TUF 14 episode 5 recap and rant

So far the numbers for the season are:
Episode 1: 1.5 million
Episode 2: 1.6 million
Episode 3: 1.3 million
Episode 4: 1.5 million (I expected higher with 2 fights on the episode)
Episode 5: 1.6  million

The show opens with a ‘Glory to God’ by the Jesus guy,Mayhem sounds real enthusiastic about it too. For some unknown reason Diego goes ape sh!t screaming at Silar, ‘I’m gonna take your head off b!tch’, followed by a well aimed punch at the wall. Resulting in Bisping telling the camera Diego is ‘A little emotionally unstable’. Dustin Neace gets a hat similar to Josh Ferguson’s resulting in some butt hurtery on Josh’s part. I understand his problem, he’s out of the competition, the only thing he has going on now is his persona. Foreshadowing?

FINALLY Mayhem figures out Dodson is the ‘mole’ leading to some cloak and dagger action. Mayhem leads everyone to believe the next fight will be between Silar and Diego, hoping to catch Akira (in Akira’s blog he says he had t odrop somewhere in the range of 28 pounds) off guard and overweight, not to mention pissing Diego off royally. Foreshadowing?

Josh decides to steals Neace’s hat, Neace immediately thinks it’s Akira so he destroys all of Akira’s stuff at the house and at the gym, starting a war between himself and Akira plus pissing off Bisping. At the fight announcement Neace and Akira spent several minutes cursing at each other before Mayhem gets to announce that they are the next fighters up. Akira walks right into Neace’s face with his forehead, Neace retaliates by taking Akira down (slowly, sloppily and totally telegraphed, staged?) ,the Coaches have to rush in a break them up. Mayhem pulls Akira off and separates them, Bisping gets into a little crap with Mayhem’s coaches, then Mayhem shoves Bisping, flaring tempers up. All of the drama on this episode stems directly from Dodson and Josh Ferguson. Great job guys, be proud.

Dodson is told by Mayhem that they all know he’s the mole, Dodson doesn’t really care. Why should he? It’s a game-show, the winner gets money, fame, a contract, major sponsors etc.

The weigh ins: Bisping is not there again. The reason given is, “He had a thing with a guy.” Bisping shows up late, driving a black Charger. A little subliminal messaging with the cars? Mayhem, white car, Bisping, black car…Foreshadowing? Hmmmm.

It’s fight time. Dustin Neace 22-16-1 vs. Akira Corassani 9-3, with a 1″ hieght and 1/2″ reach advantage for Neace. Round 1 starts with both fighters feeling each other out, a few punches and kicks in the opening minute. As has become the norm, Mayhem’s fighter listens better to him than Akira does to Bisping. Neace throws a lazy roundhouse kick and gets taken down by Akira. Akira ends up in Neace’s full guard, landing a few elbows, concentrating on holding him down. Towards the end of the round Akira opens up a little more, Neace switches to a leg submission, Akira clearly taps, Neace lets go of the hold, the Ref doesn’t do sh!t. They stand up with Akira getting the best of the exchanges. I give the round to Akira. Neace never should have let the submission go until the Ref himself separated them. A mistake I bet he never makes again.

Round 2 opens with Neace stalking Akira, Akira fires off a couple looping punches, pressuring Neace against the cage. Neace looks out of his comfort area, I think the failed sub in the first round really sapped him mentally (Mayhem later confirms my suspicion). Akira is the aggressor, Neace is playing it a bit too safe, a looping left puts Neace on his back, Akira pounces, he’s unable to finish. Akira holds Neace down, landing good shots from the top, Neace needs a KO or sub to win at this point. Akira ties Neace up on the ground up against the cage, Neace spins for a sub, Akira counters, ends up back in half guard landing the occasional elbow or punch. Neace going for desperation sub attempts. Not the prettiest win for Akira, but a win is a win. Akira goes to Neace’s corner and taunts Team Mayhem. Mayhem squirts water in Bisping’s face, not the best move in my opinion. Then Mr. Vegas himself Keith Kizer steps in and informs Akira that his antics will get him suspended. Nice to see the NSAC head inserting himself into a reality TV show, make Nevada proud Keith, make Nevada proud. The official announcement is Akira with a unanimous decision win. Team Bisping has conrol of the next fight.

Before the fight started, Josh Ferguson had put the large M in the parking lot onto the handicap parking spot. Mayhem not realizing this, parked his car there. Someone called the tow company, after Akira wins the fight, Team Bisping pulls up chairs and watches Mayhem’s car get towed. Relishing the victory on 2 fronts.

Next weeks sneak peak gives us nothing. Sure, we get 2 fights next week, a little drama from Neace’s fight, but not much else. I’m happy about that. I know we are only 5 episodes in, yet I was expecting a ton more reality TV drama and nonsense. If the season keeps going this way, I’m a happy camper.

Best quote by contestant.
‘We are gonna fight soon.” Said 10x’s in a row with crazy eyes by Dustin Neace to Akira.

Mayhem’s best quote:
“I’ll touch you real nice.”-referring to Bisping after their altercation.

Bispings’ best quote:
“You won that round.”-referring to Diego pounding on a heavy bag during training.

Did I see Razor Rob on the coaching staff, yes I did.

That’s it!
Anthony Dominguez
comedian.writer.lover…Editor in Chief

Rumble young man Rumble