TUF Brazil: Episode 1 recap

Where to watch: en.TUF.tv
Episode 1– aprox. 8 million viewers in Brazil alone, add another 1-2 million for the online replay worldwide and you’ve got a HIT!

Worst Translations for a Coach- all was well this episode.
Best quote from a Coach-
We use a protective cup. Mine is super-sized!- Wanderlei Silva

Worst Translations for a Fighter-
I am Tiago Vela. (I am Thiago Rela)
My name is Leonardo Mafra Teixeira, aka Macarrao. (My name is Leonardo ‘Macarrao’ Mafra)

Best Fighter Quotes-
I was born to punch other guys -Francisco Drinaldo
My fights are like Rodeos, they only last 8 seconds -Charles Michael
I’d rather see his mom crying than mine- Godofredo
Damn it, I’m such a B1tch- Moraes
In Brazil, they say you have to kill a Lion a day -Vini
To me, a knockout is a perfect strategy. -Mafra

Best Dana White Quotes:
He has some nasty Jiu Jitsu ears so he must be good on the ground too.
Do or cry, we call it do or cry. (referring to the ‘do or die’ 3rd round)

How many times will Dana White say ‘Oh Sh!t’- 10 (give or take 1 or 2)

The Opening
The show starts off with a recap of TUF for the Brazilian audience, a quick look at the fighters from Brazil who have become stars, followed by a recap of who Wanderlei Silva and Vitor Belfort are, in case you didn’t know who they were, as if the Brazilian audience doesn’t know who these two international superstars are.  We are introduced to the hopefuls, Dana White gives his ‘Do you Wanna be a fighter’ speech and we are set for the elimination fights.

The Fights:
Rony ‘Jason’ Mariano vs. Dileno Lopes-Featherweights
Rony starts with a good front kick, followed by a great inside leg kick, he has some good stand up, Dileno looks like he’s waiting for his opportunity, Rony is pushing the pace, he misses and Dileno lands a great shot putting Rony on his back, followed by some GnP. Rony is back on this feet, he looks to be recovered, Dileno is breathing heavy, winging punches, he eats a flying knee from Rony, then eats an overhand right as he’s backpedaling putting him on his back and the Ref calls it.
Rony wins by TKO at 2:43 of the first round. 

Francisco Drinaldo vs. Charles Michael-Middle weights
Charles comes out pushing the pace, looking for a quick finish, he gets it, 14 seconds in. Francisco is moving backwards looking to counter, he ties up with Charles, lands a HEAVY knee to the belly, then using the Thai clinch pulls Charles to the ground and lands some death blows, I mean a hammer fist followed by a few punches to the face of his dead KO’d opponent, I pity the rest of the fighters at Middleweight. Pity them.
Francisco Drinaldo wins by KO  at 14 seconds of the  1st round.  

Godofredo ‘Pepey’ de Oliviera vs. Johnny ‘Cabeca’ Goncalves -Featherweights
The round starts with the fighters feeling each other out, the other guy lands first, they tie up, Godofredo is able to take him down, he reversed, ends up on top and in an armbar, he lifts Godofredo up and carries him over to the fence, where Godofredo lands some shots, still holding the submission, he falls and keeps struggling to get out of the sub, Godofredo keeps re adjusting and rolls him over for the win, submission by arm lock. Nice ground work.
Godofredo ‘Pepey’ de Oliviera wins by submission (arm lock) at the 3:38 mark of rond 1.

Cezar ‘Mutante’ Ferreira vs. Gustavo Barbosa Sampaio-Middleweights
Cezar has some real pressure on him, as he is trained by Vitor outside of this competition. Damn, good and bad for him. Gustavo is a Brazilian Ginger, I find that interesting. Onto the fight… Gustavo lands first, Cezar follows up, Gustavo is controlling so far, with heavy punches and strong kicks, they tie up, Cezar has an impressive clinch game, landing knees and undercuts, he gets Gustavo to the ground with a punch, knee and constant pressure. While on the ground Cezar lands terrible elbows (12-6) which are illegal, and to the back of the head, the ref stands them up and warns Cezar, Gustavo is bleeding badly from a cut on the back of his head from the illegal elbows. The round ends with both men standing. I think Cezar should have had a point taken. Actually 2 points at least.
Round 2- Gustavo floors Cezar with a leg kick. Follows up with some heavy punches, they just miss, he lands again, Cezar has a good chin. Cezar is pushing forward missing with punches, Gustavo is better on the feet, Cezar goes for the takedown, ends up in a guillotine, he picks Gustavo up over his head and slams him, ending up on top, and subs Gustavo with a front guillotine.
Cezar should have been disqualified, the downward elbows to the back of the head not only rang Gustavo’s bell, they cut him open badly.  I’m rooting against Cezar for the rest of this show and his career.
Cezar ‘Mutante’ Ferreira wins by front guillotine at the _____ (blank because there was no time clock shown) mark of the 2nd round.

Hugo ‘Wolverine’ Viana vs. Alexandre ‘Sangue’ Ramos-Featherweights
Sangue’s nickname should be ‘high’ cause he looks more stoned than Joe Rogan at a dispensary. Onto the fight…They touch gloves, Sangue lands first, they break, Wolverine comes in, eats a punch and knees, they tie up, Sangue jumps guard from the clinch and tries to get an armbar or triangle, Wolverine squeaks out, and ends up on top. Wolverine lands some body shots from the top, a nice heavy shot to the head, Sangue is tyrying to tie him up, looking for a sub attempt, he’s working very slowly for a 2 round fight. Wolverine is in control, he stacks up and lands some shots, a few elbows, and back to the body. He’s holding Sangue by the neck and landing shots, Sangue needs to get up, he’s being dominated. Wolverine flattens him out and moves to side control for an instant, back to full guard. Wolverine stakcs up and lands a hard elbow, he’s out, Dana’s yelling it, Wolverine lands 3 more vicious elbows to an unconscious Sangue before the ref stops the fight, Dana is scream ‘he’s out’ frantically. It’s over.
Hugo ‘Wolverine’ Viana wins by KO (elbows) at the 1:15 mark of the 1st round.

Daniel Sarafian vs. Rachardson ‘Monstrao’ Moreira-Middleweights
We are told by Vitor and Wanderlei that this was one of their favorite fights, it’s a recap of a long back and forth entertaining fight, we see that it was an even bout with each fighter getting the upper hand. An illegal knee by Sarafin loses him the first round. Sarafin is on top at the end of the 2nd round and wins by TKO, I think, it wasn’t exactly clear.
Daniel Sarafian wins by something at the whatever mark of the 2nd round, or maybe by decision, he’s in the house is all I know.

Fabricio Guerreiro vs. Rodrigo Damm-Featherweights
Another recap by the coaches, Guerreiro has the upper hand, but Rodrigo is game, he tries for the takedown, the round ends with no clear victor. Rodrigo is able to capitalize on a slight mistake by Guerreiro and wins by neck crank in the 2nd.
Rodrigo Damm wins by sub (neck crank) in the 2nd round.

Wagner ‘Galeto’ Campos’ vs. Fernando Duarte Guerra-Middleweights
Again, the coaches give a recap of the fight, I don’t like this at all. I want to see them fight and make my own decisions on their talent. Apparently this fight was boring, terribly boring. No one at the table is impressed with either fighter. Dana is visibly  bored and frustrated. It goes to a 3rd round, also boring. Galeto is only fighting for points, hope he steps it up in the house.
Wagner ‘Galeto Campos wins by decision after a ‘do or cry’ third round.

Sergio ‘Serginho’ Moraes vs. Thiago Rela-Featherweights
Serginho is a Jiu Jitsu champion, Rela knows who he is and calls him a legend/idol. Finally, a full fight without the recap. The round starts with Rela pushing the action, he ties up Moraes and tries for the takedown, Moraes reverses and picks him up for a huge slam, they end up on the ground in dueling leg locks, trading punches from this strange cross legged sitting position, each trying for the upper hand, they both land some good punches, but Moraes has the better position, able to sit straight up, Rela is landing the better shots, leading Moraes to lean back and attempt to secure a leg/ankle sub, he wrenches Rela’s leg free and applies some incredible torque, forcing Rela to tap. Afterwards Wanderlei calls it the funniest fight he’s seen, because of the sitting position they stayed in and traded punches in until the finish by Moraes.
Wagner ‘Serginho’ Moraes by submission 2:45 of the 1st round.

Rafael Bueno vs. Anistavio ‘Gasparzinho’ Medeiros-Middleweights
Another Coach recap, Gaspar takes the first round, Rafael the second and Gaspar the third, I get the feeling the coaches were leaning toward Rafael but they like Gaspar.
Anistavio ‘Gasparzinho’ Medeiros wins by decision after a ‘do or cry’ third round.

Joao Paulo ‘Tuba’ De Souza vs. Thiago ‘Bodao’ Perpetuo-Featherweights
Another coaches recap, apparently this was an exceptional fight, making me wonder why it wasn’t shown in its entirety if it was so good. We find out Bodao had shoulder Cancer, and came back to fight, something the doctor’s said would never be possible. Inspirational. Tuba looked good but lost the first and was severely dominated through the second, he couldn’t even stand up for the judges decision. Bodao is something.
Thiago ‘Bodao’ Perpetuo by decision 2nd round.

Giovanni ‘Soldado’ Souza Jr. vs. John ‘Macapa’ Teixeira-Featherweights
The fight starts with both fighters attacking, Souza and Teixeira take separate heavy shots to the groin, brief rest for each shot and they come back at each other, Tex goes for the takedown and ends up on top. They tie up on the ground, Teixeira goes for the sub, locks up Souza’s arms rolls onto his back and Souza is forced to tap.
John ‘Macapa’ Teixeira wins by sub (arm lock) at the  something mark of the 1st round, again no time clock.

Gilberto ‘Giba’ Galvao vs. Delson ‘Pe De Chumbo’ Heleno-Middleweights
Another recap, this is getting exceedingly irritating. A shot of Dana, who looks bored/pissed during this fight. We learn that Giba dominated both rounds and advances. He looked good. Dana is impressed with the fight, despite the earlier video footage of him looking bored/angry.
Gilberto ‘Giba’ Galvao wins by decision 2 rounds.

Gabio Bolinho vs. Renee Forte-Middleweights
AND AGAIN, coaches recap, this part really sucks, it was okay for 1 or 2 fights but now it’s not so cool. I get that they are experts, and I do value their knowledge/breakdowns, but I want to see fights, especially when they are billed as exciting/fun/etc. This one looked real good. The first round was heavy leg kicks and some nasty punches by both fighters, leading me to believe it was a close round on the judges cards. The 2nd round was some serious action with both fighters trying to finish the other fast. The punches sounded like coconuts hitting the ground when they fall from the tops of the trees. In the end it was a unanimous decision for Renee Forte, I feel bad for Gabio, cause he deserved to be in the house as well.
Renee Forte wins by decision in 2 rounds.

Marcos Vinicius ‘Vini’ Pancini vs. Pedro Nobre-Featherweights
Good, another actual fight, no recap. Pedro opens with a kick, they move a bit, Vini lands a hard punch, Pedro is sown, he follows with some GnP while Pedro is visibly out of it. Pedro tries to lock up a leg and get a hail mary submission, Vini spins, inadvertently kicking Pedro in the face (that didn’t help him clear his head, and it was illegal as they were both grounded) and lands more GnP, they get to the feet, Vini lands again they tie up, Vini creates a bit of distance and Pedro eats a knee, Vini lands a right and left dropping Pedro again, the ref calls it. It was so fast, I may have the order of the punches and knees wrong, suffice to say, Vini is no joke. His striking precision reminds me of Anderson Silva, not the power, but the accuracy is close, real close.
Marcos Vinicius ‘Vini’ Pancini by TKO4:20 (really, 4:20) at  of the 1st round.

Samuel Trindade vs. Leonardo ‘Macarrao’ Mafra-Middleweights
No recap, thank you. Mafra lands a good shot, they tie up, he lands a good knee to the head, they break, he knocks Trindade down with an overhand right, he lets him up, tries a flying knee and slips, Trindade ends up on top, Mafra transitions, ends up on top and they stand. In the final seconds, they both try to establish a lead, throwing leather hard.
Round 2- Mafra comes out swinging and kicking, he backs Trindade up against the fence, Trindade pushes off, they trade in the center of the Octagon™, Trindade lands a hard punch, Marfra shakes it off, they keep trading in the center, both fighters are tired, no one is covering up, just swinging, Mafra has the slight advantage but is tiring fast. At the final seconds, he gets taken down, the coaches stand up and applaud. These guys want it bad. It goes to a third, no surprise as it’s been a very close fight the whole way through, it’s up to whoever wants it the most now.
Round 3- Both guys are exhausted, they trade, still not covering up, both guys have dropped their mouthpieces 1x apiece. They are winging punches, breathing heavy, it’s ugly but entertaining, Mafra goes for a takedown, it’s stuffed, he tries again, gets a leg, they stand up, eats a punch and a knee, they are throwing crazy again, they both lose their mouth pieces, Trindade is trying to tell the ref he’s lost his, the ref tells him to keep fighting, then he grabs both mouth pieces and I think he puts the wrong mouth piece in each guys mouth, Trindade is protesting, but the ref wont listen, I can’t stop laughing, I’m pretty sure they are each wearing the other guys mouth piece now. Hilarious, the exhaustion is evident, Trindade isn’t even lifting his hands, just eating punches then firing back, WOW. They clinch, Mafra is landing knees, Trindade goes down, gets a leg and is able to get Mafra down, he gets full mount and Mafra transitions, he’s in a triangle on top as the round ends. Again, I say WOW! That fight was excellent, I’m giving both guys a pass on their cardio because they tried as hard as possible to finish the other. Props to both guys.
Leonardo ‘Macarrao’ Mafra wins by decision ‘do or cry’ 3rd round. Wanderlei calls it the best fight of the night. I agree, I am entertained!

The end-
Dana, Wanderlei and Vitor give a quick congrats/speech to the fighters who advanced. We get a quick recap of the winners and a quick look at the upcoming season. If you look closely, you can see exactly who’s gonna be on who’s team. This season looks like it will have some real entertaining ‘reality’. Yay. If you are interested in knowing who advances to the actual final, it appears the results have been leaked. Since we are excited to see this season, we aren’t gonna post them up here.

That’s It!
Anthony Dominguez
comedian.writer.lover…Editor in Chief

Rumble young man Rumble