War Machine Jail Blog Season 2 Episode 30

War Machine (AKA Jon Koppenhaver) is back in jail for a 3 year old assault charge and just like his stint last year, he’s blogging from jail. We will be posting War Machine’s blogs with commentary in greenWe wish him the best and poke fun with only good intentions.

“Those for whom chastity is difficult should be counseled against it, lest it become their road to hell…” -Nietzsche -Nietzsche is the sh1t!

If that ain’t the truth! It’s like with my wife, I loved her so much, had no complains, she never bitched or did anything to piss me off, and even so, I began to resent her. I started being mean for no reason at all; all she ever did was love me, but I became miserable nonetheless and only saw her as a warden. Marriage, and the limits it put on my freedom, was suffocating to me – there’s no better way to describe it. Why couldn’t we have abstained from marriage, and just lived as we were happily ever after? Immigration issues kinda rushed us into it, but I also did it because I loved her and really thought I could do it. I was wrong though, it’s just not in my blood. If I just hadn’t tried to conform, if I’d just been me, maybe we could have made a better arrangement. I really miss her sometimes, especially when I think of the pre-marriage days, she was special, the first lover I ever had who was also my friend. It’s a lil’ sad, but WTF can you do? You can’t fight that inner-beast forever; I guess I’m destined to be a life-long bachelor. Fuck it, that’s me. What if prostitution was still legal? Would an occasional trip to a whorehouse been a cure to me? How many other marriages would be saved by them? My Japanese friend said that in Japan, men are allowed to cheat, as long as it’s only with hookers. That’s pretty awesome, I wonder what their divorce rate is compared to ours? -Japan rocks. Case closed.

Whatever though, no sense dwelling on imaginary “what if’s.” Einstein said: “Life is like riding a bicycle, in order not to fall, you must keep moving forward.” Maybe not verbatim, but you get the idea. I actually included that quote in a letter to my grandpa when my grandma died a couple weeks ago; I still haven’t heard from him, I just hope he’s hanging in there. This fuckin’ sucks, I only have like 7 weeks left but that little amount of time is enough for them to justify keeping me away from my loved ones when they need me. Would it matter if I only had 2 days left, would they make an exception then? You damn well know they would not. If you pay like $5 G’s you can attend the funeral in shackles though, in between 2 armed guards – lovely. Wow, this has turned out to be a shitty, depressing blog. Sorry. -Thanks for bringing us down WM. Just kidding. 5g’s to attend a funeral in shackles, that sounds like a huge scam, thanks uncle sam. 

Anyway, I’m hangin’ in there, reading away and doing what I can to prepare for that @Bellator MMA tourney, January on @SpikeTV – I’m so excited for it! I can’t wait to be back in that cage breaking people off – and without having to go to jail – it doesn’t get much better than that. It’s not a sport, it’s war. Athletes make millions playing kid games. MMA fighters put everything on the line – blood, sweat, and tears – just to put food in our belly and a roof over our heads. That’s SURVIVAL, and fighting for your life isn’t a sport, it’s not a game, it really is war. -January is almost here, WM back int he cage is gonna be fun to watch. 

I will get back up.

Jonathan Koppenhaver #2519422
330 S. Casino Center Blvd.
Las Vegas, NV 89101

War Machine’s reading wish list Amazon 
Go to this link to put $ on War Machine’s Books 
Booking # 0002519422

Rumble young man Rumble